To: YOU
Date: TODAY
Subject: YOURSELF
Reference: LIFE
I am God.
Today I will be handling all of your problems.
Please remember that I do not need your help.
If life happens to deliver a situation to you that you cannot handle, do not attempt to resolve it.
Kindly put it in the SFGTD (something for God to do) box.
It will be addressed in My time, not yours.
Once the matter is placed into the box, do not hold on to it.
If you find yourself stuck in traffic; Don't despair.
There are people in this world for whom driving is an unheard of privilege.
Should you have a bad day at work;
Think of the man who has been out of work for years.
Should you despair over a relationship gone bad;
Think of the person who has never known what it's like to love and be loved in return.
Should you grieve the passing of another weekend;
Think of the woman in dire straits, working twelve hours a day, seven days a week to feed her children.
Should your car break down, leaving you miles away from assistance;
Think of the paraplegic who would love the opportunity to take that walk.
Should you notice a new grey hair in the mirror;
Think of the cancer patient in chemo who wishes she had hair to examine.
Should you find yourself at a loss and pondering what is life all about, asking what is my purpose?
Be thankful.
There are those who didn't live long enough to get the opportunity.
Should you find yourself the victim of other people's bitterness, ignorance, smallness or insecurities;
Remember, things could be worse.
You could be them!!!!
Sunday, October 11, 2009
Saturday, July 4, 2009
Practice safe sex...or you could end up burning your house down!!
Mary: There's something baking in my oven.
Me: Err... maybe you should go home then..
Mary: It was a mistake.
Me: Yeah I know, so you should go home and remedy that mistake.
Mary: How would going home help?
Me: Um, because you can turn off your oven...
Mary: This isn't something that I can just turn off. I have to face the facts.
Me: What kind of oven doesn't turn off?
Mary: I know! It was just so unexpected!
Me: .. Didn't you try out the oven before you bought it?
Mary: ...... Are we talking about the same thing?
Me: The oven?
Mary: I'm pregnant.
Me: WHAT?
Mary: I know.
Me: .. Okay, but wait. I think the oven thing is more of an immediate problem. Maybe we can talk about this pregnancy after we turn off your oven.
Mary:... Oh god. The oven is my god-damn uterus.
Lesson of the day: Use a condom.
Me: Err... maybe you should go home then..
Mary: It was a mistake.
Me: Yeah I know, so you should go home and remedy that mistake.
Mary: How would going home help?
Me: Um, because you can turn off your oven...
Mary: This isn't something that I can just turn off. I have to face the facts.
Me: What kind of oven doesn't turn off?
Mary: I know! It was just so unexpected!
Me: .. Didn't you try out the oven before you bought it?
Mary: ...... Are we talking about the same thing?
Me: The oven?
Mary: I'm pregnant.
Me: WHAT?
Mary: I know.
Me: .. Okay, but wait. I think the oven thing is more of an immediate problem. Maybe we can talk about this pregnancy after we turn off your oven.
Mary:... Oh god. The oven is my god-damn uterus.
Lesson of the day: Use a condom.
Swine Flu bug!!
I walked into work one morning to find a billion memos on my desk and on bathroom walls and few mails in my mailbox suggesting that with the whole Swine Flu thing going on,all employees should wash their hands after using the bathroom, and before they eat. Also, employees should cover their mouth/nose when coughing/sneezing.
Apparently employees are taking these new suggestions really seriously, which sort of disturbs me because shouldn't people already know to wash their hands after they take a piss/jerk off, and isn't it common sense to cover your nose when sneezing so you don't pollute the office with your diseases? I mean, to not do any of those things is like having Gonorrhea and not wearing a condom and having sex.
Actually, if you have Gonorrhea you should probably not have sex at all.
Apparently these notices are actually necessary because yesterday, when I was in the bathroom, two men walked out of the stalls and left without washing their hands. What the eff.
I've also noticed that people are starting to stay away from foreign employees, which is just discrimination if you ask me considering most of them haven't left India in years.
How about where you are? What measures have your company taken to prevent Swine Flu from spreading into the workplace? Are people more discriminatory towards foreign returned people than ever before?
Apparently employees are taking these new suggestions really seriously, which sort of disturbs me because shouldn't people already know to wash their hands after they take a piss/jerk off, and isn't it common sense to cover your nose when sneezing so you don't pollute the office with your diseases? I mean, to not do any of those things is like having Gonorrhea and not wearing a condom and having sex.
Actually, if you have Gonorrhea you should probably not have sex at all.
Apparently these notices are actually necessary because yesterday, when I was in the bathroom, two men walked out of the stalls and left without washing their hands. What the eff.
I've also noticed that people are starting to stay away from foreign employees, which is just discrimination if you ask me considering most of them haven't left India in years.
How about where you are? What measures have your company taken to prevent Swine Flu from spreading into the workplace? Are people more discriminatory towards foreign returned people than ever before?
Power of Love
"I've found almost everything ever written about love to be true. Shakespeare said, "journeys end in lovers meeting". What an extraordinary thought. Personally, I have experienced something remotely close to that and so I am more than willing to believe what Shakespeare said. I suppose I think about love more than anyone really should. I am constantly amazed by its sheer power to alter and define our lives. It was Shakespeare who also said "love is blind". Now that is something I know to be true. For some, quite inexplicably, love fades; for others, love is simply lost."
Sunday, April 26, 2009
DrEaM TiLL Ur DrEaMz CoMe TrUe
Sometimes what you really need to change is not your hair or your clothes but your entire out of whack life.
Women and men of all generations are looking as I am, to improve themselves. The tragedy of life is that fewer than one in five of us feel that he or she is living their best life. I hear people whining all the time and complaining about what is wrong in their world. I believe life is full of difficulties but what you focus on expands, what you give your attention to is what you become. So put your focus where it works for you.Dont focus on those negative feelings. Instead turn your gaze to the changes you want to make coz what you centre your attention on becomes the most powerful thing in your life. You cannot go through life expecting that anything outside yourself, a job, a relationship, will bring you contentment. The process of moving towards that goal is what will bring you to your best self.
It is important in life to have no attachments to our expectations. The minute you say “I can live without this” you will be rewarded with a true sense of peace. I firmly believe the Universe dreams a bigger dream for you than you can dream for yourself. I trust in a power greater than myself and true faith means stepping out on that. But dreams don’t just happen; you need to do your part. Your job is to discover what your true calling is and who, but you are going to know that. So set your course for who you believe yourself to be.
Women and men of all generations are looking as I am, to improve themselves. The tragedy of life is that fewer than one in five of us feel that he or she is living their best life. I hear people whining all the time and complaining about what is wrong in their world. I believe life is full of difficulties but what you focus on expands, what you give your attention to is what you become. So put your focus where it works for you.Dont focus on those negative feelings. Instead turn your gaze to the changes you want to make coz what you centre your attention on becomes the most powerful thing in your life. You cannot go through life expecting that anything outside yourself, a job, a relationship, will bring you contentment. The process of moving towards that goal is what will bring you to your best self.
It is important in life to have no attachments to our expectations. The minute you say “I can live without this” you will be rewarded with a true sense of peace. I firmly believe the Universe dreams a bigger dream for you than you can dream for yourself. I trust in a power greater than myself and true faith means stepping out on that. But dreams don’t just happen; you need to do your part. Your job is to discover what your true calling is and who, but you are going to know that. So set your course for who you believe yourself to be.
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
Fear Of Loosing Your Job In Economic Crisis
The current economic scenario is grim with lot of uncertainties bugging the whole world and in this period of crisis India is also not left behind. In India, the employer employs the entire family of the individual. The family’s identity is impacted by the organization. Organization expects unwavering loyalty from their employees but when they have to choose between their interests and the interests of their employees, they always ignore the employees. So, when an employee is asked to leave, it takes away the sense of pride of the parents, the spouse, and the children. The emotional impact of the lay-off is so much more than just the loss of livelihood.
Work gives meaning to your life. If most of your identity resides in the business card in your wallet, then the moment the organization shreds that card, the individual’s identity also gets dismantled. So, never let an organization determine who you are. The corporate world is full of illusions. Like all illusions, they are ephemeral. Power, money, and in some cases even your relationships are not real. Don’t ever take the business card so seriously that it defines your entire identity and you feel helpless without it.
What matters is not what you expected from life, but what life expected from you. Stop asking about the meaning of life and instead, think of yourself as the one being questioned by life. Ultimately, you have the responsibility of finding the right answers to life’s problems.Life goes on and so are your fears!!
Work gives meaning to your life. If most of your identity resides in the business card in your wallet, then the moment the organization shreds that card, the individual’s identity also gets dismantled. So, never let an organization determine who you are. The corporate world is full of illusions. Like all illusions, they are ephemeral. Power, money, and in some cases even your relationships are not real. Don’t ever take the business card so seriously that it defines your entire identity and you feel helpless without it.
What matters is not what you expected from life, but what life expected from you. Stop asking about the meaning of life and instead, think of yourself as the one being questioned by life. Ultimately, you have the responsibility of finding the right answers to life’s problems.Life goes on and so are your fears!!
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
What’s my Personality Trait?
One fine morning while trying to wake up, I asked myself..
Who am I? What’s my identity?
Am I an “Esthete” person who is responsive and delighted with, whatever seems b’ful.
Am I an “Epicurean” person for whom happiness, pleasure, fun are the most important things in life.
Am I an “Altruistic” person who likes helping others.
Am I a person who sometimes becomes “Stoic” by giving up envy, greed, jealousy, hatred and other human passions.
Am I a “Gregarious” person who loves the company of friends.
Am I a “Suave” person who at times shows expertise in getting along with women and make their hearts flutter.
Am I an “Ambivert” person who at times is happy to be alone but at times prefer the company of others to solitude.
Am I an “Effervescent” person who is generally sparkling, happy, bubbling over with zest and high spirits.
Am I a person who at times become “Acrimonious” with sharpness and bitterness in speech or temper.
Am I a person who is always on the “Qui vive”.
My thoughts then wander to these words
“Men never know precisely what is right
So, torn between a purpose & a doubt
He first makes windows to let in the light
And then hangs curtains up to shut it out”
My thoughts are then interrupted by ringing of the alarm bell thus hanging the curtains of my thoughts..
And I tell myself…..Get ready for office Dude….
“You are a Banker”
Who am I? What’s my identity?
Am I an “Esthete” person who is responsive and delighted with, whatever seems b’ful.
Am I an “Epicurean” person for whom happiness, pleasure, fun are the most important things in life.
Am I an “Altruistic” person who likes helping others.
Am I a person who sometimes becomes “Stoic” by giving up envy, greed, jealousy, hatred and other human passions.
Am I a “Gregarious” person who loves the company of friends.
Am I a “Suave” person who at times shows expertise in getting along with women and make their hearts flutter.
Am I an “Ambivert” person who at times is happy to be alone but at times prefer the company of others to solitude.
Am I an “Effervescent” person who is generally sparkling, happy, bubbling over with zest and high spirits.
Am I a person who at times become “Acrimonious” with sharpness and bitterness in speech or temper.
Am I a person who is always on the “Qui vive”.
My thoughts then wander to these words
“Men never know precisely what is right
So, torn between a purpose & a doubt
He first makes windows to let in the light
And then hangs curtains up to shut it out”
My thoughts are then interrupted by ringing of the alarm bell thus hanging the curtains of my thoughts..
And I tell myself…..Get ready for office Dude….
“You are a Banker”
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